One half of the iconic Blood Gulch gang from Red vs. Blue, brought to you in Eka form by
ZergAlts! Not intended for any kind of RP, just for when the player feels lurk-y and silly.
See also:
Blue_Team
From left to right:
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Lopez la el Pesado ("the Heavy"): Sarge's pet project and team mechanic, a robot who only speaks bad Spanish (and occasionally takes advantage of the fact he's the only one fluent in the language). Lopez seems to view his teammates with cold resentment, either due to their reliance on him for mechanical help, constant damage to the team Warthog that Lopez ends up repairing, for programming him to speak Spanish instead of English, or all of the above.
Private First Class Richard "Dick" Simmons: Sarge's right-hand man and suck-up extraordinaire, though an incident involving Sarge being incorrectly declared dead showed how quickly this loyalty evaporates once an opportunity for promotion arises. Simmons attempts to be the voice of reason with regard to Sarge's (frequently insane) plans, with little success. For one, Sarge is too out there, for two, Simmons is too sycophantic to truly qualify as "sane". Simmons forms a comic duo with Grif, though has expressed a disturbing eagerness to sacrifice his friend in an effort to gain favor with Sarge. After Lopez defected and Grif needed an organ donor, Simmons was upgraded to a cyborg by Sarge and will occasionally answer to "Simmons 2.0."
Minor Junior Private Negative First Class Dexter Grif: Lazy, out-of-shape, and Sarge's personal Butt Monkey. Just about every one of Sarge's plans involves Grif being killed in some way, and most of Red Team's official emergency protocols begin by shooting Grif. Grif is suggested to be fairly intelligent, at least in the eyes of Church, but he's too much of a slacker to contribute much. A conscript, Grif sleeps through official meetings and tries to quit the army whenever he can. He's Red Team's designated Deadpan Snarker and Only Sane Man, though his apathy towards pretty much everything somewhat cancels that out. He spends much of his time bickering with his "friend" Simmons, when he isn't stealing the latter's identity and running up huge bills at pawn shops and peep shows.
Sarge: The staff sergeant leading Red Team, and the only one in the canyon who's actually enthusiastic about the Red/Blue conflict, due to his intense and unexplained hatred of all things Blue. His real name remains a mystery, and it is implied he answers as "Sarge" even on Red Army official documents (there was one instance where we might have heard his name but Donut cut him off). Sarge is incredibly loyal to the Red Army, and goes out of his way to excuse the nonsensical answers and directives Command sends his way. He is also fiercely supportive of the chain of command, especially if this allows him to punish Grif. Sarge wields a shotgun, which he uses as a cudgel more often than actually shooting it, and speaks with a Southern US (vaguely Texan) accent. He's the only Red Team member to actually wear red armor for most of the series.
Private Franklin Delano Donut: Red Team's rookie member with some major issues, acting as the team's Ditz. He kicks off the series' Red/Blue conflict after Simmons and Grif send him to "the store" to get some "headlight fluid." Donut accidentally wanders into Blue Base and ends up capturing their flag, prompting the Blues to call in a Freelancer and start the main plot. Originally wearing standard red armor, Donut took one of Tex's grenades to the face and had to be sent away for medical help, returning with his own lightish-red armor out of recognition for his flag capture. This, combined with a flair for calligraphy, appreciation of interior decorating, and the "Officer Hot Pants" surprise at Sarge's birthday party helps solidify Donut's status as Stereotype Gay by Season Three. Although he has a surprisingly good arm when it comes to throwing grenades, as proven when he killed Tex with a precision throw from across the canyon, in most combat situations he is expected (and ordered) to run around and scream like a girl, a role he takes to with gusto.
